Time flattens the playing field for all, no matter how rich, poor, short, tall, et cetera, et cetera… We all have to deal with the reality that none of us knows how much time we really have. So, make the best of it!! That’s what they say. Whoever “they” are. But this time, I think they’re onto something. My dad passed from a sudden heart attack at age 65, when he was getting ready to retire and enjoy life, the “good stuff” he used to say.
He never got to that good stuff.
Back in 2001, my mom retired from three administrative positions at the age of 71 to deal with the horror of brain disease. Needless to say, that wasn’t her plan. I watched her lose the ability to speak within six months and cared for her the next 10, never knowing what was going on in her mind. My oldest sister who I look after and have since I was 12, is disabled from depression, along with a host of other medical issues. I have been exposed to more psychotherapy in my life than anyone I’ve met who is not in the physical care or mental health profession.
Why am I sharing this stuff?!!? No one wants to hear it, much less talk about it, but everyone deals with mental health from both sides on their own in silence, much like I did. Although there were tons of groups out there to help, I didn’t have the time or energy to seek it. Whether you are suffering from a mental illness or the caregiver to someone you’ve watched deteriorate over something out of their control, you are valid.
These experiences shaped my thinking and made me who I am today. I was a very curious boy, raised in the Roman Catholic religion and would constantly ask myself and those around me, “What’s the purpose to this?”
Everything and everyone should have a purpose, no? A lot of this world doesn’t make sense, but I think it should.
Most everything is not black and white, cut and dry, left or right. Ignorance is truly bliss if life can be boiled down to black and white. Yet I often see many people doing it or thinking this way. Is it just me, or do you seek answers too? Does everything have to make sense, or is it just me?